A version of this is also available in Spanish here.

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Dear friends and random readers (not that random readers couldn’t also be my friends), it comes as no surprise, because probably all of you already know, that I started a new job a few months ago.

When I got the job and I told some friends and family, I kinda surprised everyone when I told them where I’d work now and how different it would be from my eternal free-spirited work life. I’d have to work in a real office for the first (second, I guess if you count an internship) time in my life. I’d have a schedule. I’d probably have to not wear pajamas at work. More importantly, I wouldn’t be able to sing out loud while working. Huge changes.

And so it happened. As La Oreja de Van Gogh said:

I started working at a bank.

And I’ve obviously been meaning to write something about it since the first day I stepped into my new workplace but I’m happy I let my thoughts marinate. Mainly because now I’m able to add a reference to a very current crush in the next paragraph.

When I started working in an office, I had A LOT of questions. I didn’t know how it’d be, how I’d feel, what actually working in an office would be like. Add to that a layer of German and another layer of financial and banking concepts, I’d be quite outside of my element of watching chick flicks and falling in love (once again) with Adam Brody.

There it was, that was the reference.

But it’s been fun! I’ve learned a lot! It’s been challenging!

So okaaaaaaaaaaay, let’s go! This is (almost) everything about it.

First things first, why stop working remotely if it’s so awesome?

Many reasons.

Working remotely allowed me to do a bunch of things like learning a new language, moving to a different country, spending long periods of time in my Heimatland, traveling while working, waking up late, starting new hobbies, learning how to make gnocchi in the middle of the day and a HUGE etc. And, while those are all amazing things it was also very tough, mentally speaking.

Working remotely can be very lonely.

And I know a lot of remote work influencers will come at me saying that there are a lot of communities of remote workers and that you can always meet people and you need to be intentional about socialization and I wish they would try that in a tiny country like the one I live in. Now, I’m not saying it’s impossible, I did manage to make some friends and have a social life, but it was really very difficult, especially when there was no real reason for me to go out of my house. And I love being inside, just thinking about going out to a random class or a random networking event empties my social battery. So I just knew that would never change, I would have to force myself to go out.

Add to that the experience of migrating, which has been also full of loneliness. I’ve never been physically alone but it’s deeply isolating to be in a context where everything is new to you, where you basically know three people, and where even if you’re among others, your loneliness is accentuated by the fact that you don’t understand what they’re talking or laughing about. In this context, even the most simple things like going to the supermarket can be challenging.

Remote work was like a small refugee for me because at least at work, I felt useful and smart, and I felt like I was going somewhere. I understood how everything worked and it kept me busy. The jobs and colleagues I had were always great, I felt fulfilled in that sense.

Until I didn’t!

It came to a point in my journey here where I was still struggling to feel like I belonged and that I had a reason (besides the obvious reason of love which is by the way very strong but I think other types of fulfillment are always needed) to have a life here.

In an ideal world, I’d be paid to watch reality shows and start Reddit threads about them but since that won’t likely happen any time soon, I need to chase the cutlet, as we say in Spanish. And, if I anyway need to work, I better be getting something out of it.

And for now, that’s having a routine, meeting and talking with people every day, and going out. Having written this, it seems incredibly basic and boring and even sad but reader, I really needed it.

And also, money and good benefits don’t hurt. If you’re wondering what’s the price of losing flexibility, well, it’s in my contract. I wasn’t making bad money, I actually had a decent salary considering the salaries for remote jobs that I’ve seen recently. But it was simply not good enough. Even if I managed to change jobs, the salary and benefits I’m getting would probably not compare to those offered by remote work. But more on hating Capitalism in the next paragraphs.

First, let’s talk about adaptation.

About adapting

I honestly thought it would take me longer and it would be harder to adapt to a new routine. I thought I’d miss being at home the whole time. Although I do miss some of the flexibility I had when working remotely (three-hour-long lunch dates with friends!), working in an office isn’t terrible at all.

I have a clear working time, a nice office, a super nice (and cheap) cafeteria, decent colleagues, GOOD benefits, a very short commute (10-20 minutes depending on the bus I catch), and a job that challenges me in unexpected ways every day.

I can see the point of people hating the office, especially if they need more flexibility in their lives for whatever reason, have super long commutes, don’t have good working opportunities nearby, or simply just hate working in an office—a very valid reason in itself.

However, all those reasons don’t apply to me because I’m unique and special. I’m kidding, I’m just extremely privileged.

But besides that, I can also now see the point of working in an office and collaborating face-to-face. What I will say is, some things that took weeks to decide when working remotely, now take a quick visit to a desk. Does that interrupt the flow of the person you’re visiting? Most probably. Does that lead to nice conversations sometimes? Also probably but I’ve learned tons of interesting facts about many random things. Is that annoying? Only if I’m in the middle of listening to the newest album of Hozier, but I can always replay the song to make sure he’ll be my most listened-to artist of the year. After all, Spotify Wrapped is coming soon.

Then again, if I was maybe in other stage in my life, I wouldn’t appreciate all these things but today, I do.

What has really surprised me about working in an office is the amount of food I’ve been randomly given. It’s impressive!!! Here’s a (small) taste:

One colleague just passed by with a box of popsicles and offered me one. If I was a kid, I’d probably be kidnapped by now.

But other than that, it’s quite similar to what I had imagined it to be. Learning how to navigate office politics, understanding processes, knowing who is who, and everything in between is quite similar to what I pictured. An office is an office in The Office and in real life.

That’s all ok. It’s obviously sometimes depressing to think that this will be my routine for a few years but hey, wasn’t it also depressing to work at home all by myself? Wouldn’t it also be depressing in almost any other type of job? The problem isn’t an office, the problem is maybe this machine of Capitalism that never stops. But that’s another topic, right?

My social brain is currently in overdrive, making up for the years I was lonely at home. That’s what I’ve enjoyed the most: meeting new people and making, possibly as that’s yet to be decided, new friends. It wasn’t my initial goal but it’s happening so that’s also nice.

And finally, the topic most of you have asked about and what I was also wondering about after getting the first interview.

WHAT WILL I WEAR?!

I freaked out for a bit but then, as one friend told me when I shared with her that I’d be working at a bank: the super old banker fashion expectations are dead. I’m off-quoting here, not sure what her exact words were but the sentiment is the same. Don’t worry about me, I can wear sneakers! I don’t have to wear blazers! I’m discovering what my office style is! Pinterest thinks I’m a Japanese office gal!

And also, to clarify, it’s not like I wasn’t wearing decent shoes or clothes before, as far as I’m concerned. I think. Unless you don’t count sweatpants as decent clothes. Then, we need to have a conversation.

And I guess that’s it.

I’m sharing it because it was a huge change in my life, in my routines and now it takes up most of my time. Which again, kinda depressing, amirite? It has also made me reevaluate what’s important for me and what I care about. Mostly, it has taught me that it’s ok to change opinions and to try new things, to be open to things you might think you won’t enjoy. And whatever, it’s making me happy and that’s what matters.

Nonetheless, it is better to feel hopeful and optimistic about one’s life on earth while engaged in the never-ending struggle to pay rent, than to feel despondent and depressed while engaged in the same non-optional struggle anyway.

Sally Rooney

Plus I’ve learned incredibly personal things from my colleagues in random conversations and my spirit of chisme is really appreciating it.