No mistakes, I wanna be perfect

How refreshing to watch something like School of Chocolate. Short description: super famous chocolatier Amaury Guichon helps eight students “elevate” their pastry skills to become more like him and stuff. We watch them struggle with new techniques, create amazing things, make new friendships, and more!

It’s no secret I enjoy how messy reality TV can be. I’ve already written about my love for 90 Day Fiancé. In most reality shows, even those that are focused on skills like cooking, learning is said to be rewarded. But in fact, we kinda enjoy watching people making the same mistakes over and over again.

It’s like this reality show I watch, Darcey & Stacey, where Darcey has been looking for the love of her life for years now and we see her do exactly the same thing expecting different results. It’s very frustrating but I can’t stop watching, forgive me, God.

On the reality shows that are also competitions, we always have this rigid formats where there are challenges, some people stay and others leave. Overall, we want the bad ones to LEAVE already and we get mad when they get to stay for another week. We’re hoping the bad ones make the same mistakes again so they can finally leave. There’s no chance of redemption.

That’s one of the reasons I enjoyed School of Chocolate: nobody gets eliminated.

The chocolatier/host encourages everyone to give their best and actually helps them to improve their techniques to help succeed. In this show, we see people making mistakes but we also see them learn from them and later get WAY better. And it’s so nice!

By the end, even if you know some of them won’t win, you’re excited to see they’re learning and giving their best. Because they have the chance to show up, even if they failed before.

Refreshing, right?

We’ve all heard that if you don’t make any mistakes, you can’t learn. In a perfect world, I would like to have a perfect life. I make no mistakes. Every cake I try to bake comes out perfectly, not like those terrible strawberry muffins I made some months ago.

But sadly, failing is inevitable.

And speaking of failure, let’s talk about me learning German.

Me talking about learning German

I mean, if I’m being really honest it’s not being a failure but:

It’s been frustrating. Very frustrating.

Throughout my life, I’ve never had trouble communicating. Even if I can’t say things completely right, I know I can get my ideas across. In English, in Spanish, and in the widely spoken language of chisme.

But this thing is hard, goddamit.

See, all my life I’ve been a nerd. I’m used to doing things ok. Learn fast. I’m used to knowing how to do things or at least knowing what I don’t know and how to start knowing. This inner nerd is really hard on me. It makes me want to do more, research more. It makes me want to avoid mistakes and do everything perfectly. Just like Mellisa at School of Chocolate. 😂 She was so angry and frustrated all the time trying to be perfect haha. I can relate. Just like Mellisa learned in the end, we both need to be more humble.

This whole experience makes me feel like a kid again. The kid that sometimes cried when she didn’t get a perfect score. But I need to be compassionate with myself. I have to be patient. This will be a long process. It will take me years most likely. I have to find a way to enjoy it.

It’s scary to make mistakes as an adult, especially on things that you think should be easy, like forming basic sentences. It’s scary to be vulnerable and to think that you’ll be judged or that people will make fun of you. It’s scary to accept that you don’t know things, that you’re lost. Btw, nobody has ever made fun of me, this fear only lives in my brain. But will I still have this fear forever even if people won’t make fun of me? Yessir.

In one episode of School of Chocolate, Tyricia calls her mother to vent. She has been in the bottom several times and she’s feeling discouraged. Her mom immediately says what any mom would say, “remember you’re getting something out of it regardless.”

But it’s so hard to see at the moment!

We all know that learning is the goal. We’re not here to be perfect. We’re here to make mistakes. As my teacher says, you need to talk here in the class with your classmates so you lose the fear of talking to people. You need to try and practice. Even if you’re wrong. Or at least that’s what I understand she says, maybe I’m just making all this up 😭.

So there’s that.

Spoiler of School of Chocolate ahead.

In the first episode of the season, Tyricia makes a terrible dessert. This is something that really doesn’t show her skills. It’s not up to par with what everyone else has done. In the last episode, Amaury Guichon makes a special mention. He recognizes how Tyricia has made so much improvement. From that first dessert to the things she created in the last episode, it didn’t matter she didn’t win, we could really see improvement in her craft.

So that’s what I hope. I hope I look back to these frustrating moments in some years and thank myself for still trying even when it was hard and frustrating. I’ll be happy in some years when I’m watching a reality show in German and I can understand all the nonsense everyone is saying.

That’s my goal.

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